kiss and tell.

"The more I study,

The more I know.

The more I know,

The more I forget.

The more I forget,

The less I know.

So why study?"

 - so true.

Sometimes I just want to leave everything behind,

and go home and play with my five year old sister

who is completely oblivious to everything in life.

At this moment in time, I kind of wish I had a boyfriend too.

Relating to the matter above because back in the day,

whenever I had the crxppest day at school, or close to tears,

whether it be the mountain high homework or bxtchy fights,

At the end of the day, I had him so I thought it was alright.

Because I thought, even if I'd lost all my friends, and flopped my GCSEs,

as long as I had my boyfriend and the relationship I valued, I'd still be strong
and I hate believing that there are times, when relying on a guy is the only option.

Only recently have these thoughts clouded my mind.
I know it has only been a few months since I've had a guy in my life,
but I find it really hard to adjust without someone to fall back on at 3:30pm.

I argue with the person who is supposed to be my best friend, almost everyday,
and most of the time, it triggers from WOHAA and our fundraising ideas
that she keeps slamming down without an alternative or a back-up.
I'm supposed to be the leading director of the group and she's supposed to help.
I wouldn't even consider dropping her off either because that would cause problems,
not only in the fundraising group, but in our friendship groups too.
I can't get the grades I want in Chemistry and I don't know where I'm going wrong.
I don't know what the real reason behind my eating habits are now,
and I'm really scared that it's not because of stress.

Some people deal with stress by eating less.

I was once like that and everything sorted itself out.

Some people deal with stress by eating away.

I've become one of those people and I can't stop.

How twisted.

I acknowledge that my parents and family are wealthy.

But I still find it so hard to just ask for money when I need it.

I'd rather work for it, but recently, I've been caught up with work!

When someone asked me today, how I would define someone as annoying,

I replied, "when people don't do what I want them to."

And my gawd, I sounded like such a bxtchandahalf.

I hate hypocrites.

You can call me a bxtch. You can call the people around you bxtches.

You can say that I'm a Regina George and a total mean girl.

But then you don't even realise that you have become a bxtch!

You gossip, you bxtch, you kiss and tell. You do everything that we do!

So don't try and pretend you're different to us, you are one of us.