2am and I'm still not asleep because as much
as I wish that everything I said now, was a lie;
you can't run away from the truth.
even though it was during exam period,
like a few weeks ago, that my weight and sleep went downhill,
both my asthma and my eczema have come back.
I can't sleep at night now because all I do is cough.
and it hurts me to see my mum hurting.
and of all people, I don't want you to see me like this ><
you really can't ><
even though I say I'm going to catch up on sleep,
as much as I want to, my chest won't let me.
and neither will my fever and my nose.
i hate being ill! i hate feeling like the ugliest person
walking the streets of thetford, with my skin and my uncontrollable outbursts of coughs.
i know some people have it worse and I'm not really
in a position to be sulking like this.
but honestly, no matter how mentally strong I am,
everyone who knows me, also knows that illnesses are my weakness.
when I'm ill, I know I'm ill and I try my best
to make sure that mum and dad and you don't worry.
I wanna be able to show you that I am strong enough
to take care of myself.
♥
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